Friday, December 13, 2013

Never Mind the Cold, Here Comes the Love

It's cold out as I carry the bags to the car, piling all the crap in.

 It's early in the morning.  And it's annoying.  And it's cold.  But there won't be time to leave work, go back the the apartment, load the car and make it to my in-laws for Shabbos.  So instead, we'll load the car before we go.

It's early.  And it's cold.  And I was up early packing in order to get it all in the car so early on this cold Friday morning.

And then it strikes me.  Where am I going?  To a place where I feel warm and safe and full of love. A place where no one sits in judgement of me if I come to the table in a hoodie.  A place where the conversations are ones that I can actively take part in.  A place where i am surrounded by family.  True family who love me and accept me for who I am. 

What the hell am I complaining about???

So yes, it's cold outside.  And packing is annoying.  And having our stuff sitting in a car all day is not great for wrinkle free wear.  These are life's little inconveniences. Stress on little.  These should be our biggest problems - cold weather and annoyance - on our way to love.

So as I shove the bags into the trunk, cold air condensing in front of me and a nice 10 degree wind-chill cutting through the down, a warmth starts radiating through me.  It is a warmth that can only come from inside - generated by positive feelings.  A warmth that, I daresay, has become more routine than new in the last two years.

Unlike all that you hear or read about people and their "new" families, I love going to my in-laws.  I love my parents in law, I love my sister in law (one of them anyway) and my brother in law too.  It's nice to be surrounded by that - by people who kid with you and bust your balls and you know it's all in good fun.  It's all the things I missed out on growing up. 

So it's me - getting a second chance at family.