Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Hey, Hey What Can I Do

You can't win 'em all.  Sometimes, you can't win any. 

The fool never learns this lesson.  The fool bangs her head against the brick wall, over and over, until she's dented and bleeding and hurt - still not understanding why nothing has changed.

The wise fool?  The wise fool learns that, after the fourth or fifth bang, when the blood start dripping and matting her hair against her forehead, it's time to disengage from her fool's errand.

So what am I, the fool or the wise fool? 

I'm happy to report that I was the fool - but time and experience have made me the wise(r) fool.  I have stopped banging my head against a certain wall that cannot yield.  I've stopped crying out in frustration from things beyond my control (or, at least some things I cannot control).

Last year I would have understood my backing off as a "loss".  I have lost this battle.  I let her beat me. Again. 

But last year I was a fool. 

Now I'm a (partially) wise fool.  And I understand that I have not lost, I have gained.  Sanity, peace of mind.  It's not my headache now, it's theirs.  They are free to work it out however they want - the only rule being I am not involved in any fighting and I get final ok on everything. 

All the say, none of the headaches.

 So what am I, the fool or the wise fool? 

Looking at it, maybe I'm neither. 

Maybe, just this one time, I'm the wise one after all.