Wednesday, August 10, 2011

How Quickly a Post Becomes Stale

As quickly as a determined girl can check herself out of hospice care and into her own house.

Perhaps still to die, but at least on her own terms.

I spend several hours with her.  We sat in her backyard (the nurse wouldn't let us take a walk) and it was just like old times.  We laughed, made irreverent jokes about cancer and death, and we re-lived a hundred old memories.

I remember.  I remember all the good times.  All the times with you are good Tova.

I told her I didn't know how to say good bye.  Her response?  Why bother with good byes?  She has no use for good byes.  Alive or dead.  So there you go.

A day?  A week?  Twenty five years?  I don't know how much longer she has.  But we will ALWAYS have this night.


  1. Tova sounds like an awesome, awesome person!

  2. I was logging on to say a simple "I'm sorry" on the last post, which I saw earlier, because what more is there to say? While "happy" doesn't seem the right word to use, I was happy to see this post. I am so glad that the circumstances changed since the previous post and you were able to have this good visit, glad for you and for Tova too.

  3. So is she still getting hospice care at home?

  4. Chills. i cant even begin to imagine what it must be like for both of you

  5. She is, in fact, on hospice care at home. No miracle cure. But she's happier.

  6. Hospice at home is a good decision. For the most part, the hospice people really know what they're doing and they really help...

    It will be rough. I have seen someone die in hospice. At a certain point the person is out of it, due to the morphine etc, but it is really tough on the loved ones... A slow, gradual death vs the sudden shock...

  7. She isn't on medication for pain. At least as far as I know....